| iv> | | | | Don't even give him a chance! REACH OUT! Whether |
| Author Interview: Mommy Come Home | | | | you are new to a community or have just been pulled |
| The New Trend to Tradition: | | | | out of a huge social circle in order to stay home, you |
| Bringing Up Your Own | | | | simply must find ways to be involved. For example, I |
| Interview with Sandra Gillmore conducted by Lisa | | | | have hosted lady's Bible studies and support groups |
| Hendey | | | | just by listing an ad in our church bulletin. Sometimes |
| In her new book Mommy Come Home, author Sandra | | | | only one mom has called - but that was all I needed to |
| Gillmore strongly advocates the role of full-time | | | | make a new friend at the time. Then it would grow. |
| motherhood. Some may disagree with the | | | | You can join a group like I started, or find a local |
| book’s premise that mother should eschew | | | | MOPS (Mothers of Preschoolers,) La Leche League |
| career and stay home with children (in lieu of day care | | | | (breastfeeding support group,) or volunteer for |
| or even dad or a relative providing in home care). I | | | | something at church that may be just a few hours per |
| found the value of this book to be for readers who | | | | month. Read your local newspaper; look on the internet |
| have chosen the stay at home route and are | | | | for local church or community activities. Get involved in |
| seeking support and encouragement in this decision. | | | | politics. You may be nervous at first but reaching out is |
| Sandra Gillmore shares a veteran’s experience | | | | essential and will bring you many blessings in new |
| and perspective and has so many wonderful tips and | | | | friendships. But remember that God and family come |
| suggestions to share. Women choosing to voluntarily | | | | first. We don't need to be supermoms and burn |
| walk away from careers to pursue the vocation of | | | | ourselves out. But we definitely need to be supported |
| motherhood are often met with resistance, financial | | | | by and supportive to other moms and people in |
| concerns and a lack of support. A new mother may | | | | general. |
| find herself isolated and uncertain as she attempts to | | | | LH: What role has your Christian faith played in your |
| ascertain her new identity in life. Mommy Come Home | | | | decisions to be home full time and to homeschool your |
| is a great tool for women facing or considering such | | | | children? |
| transitions. Sandra Gillmore gives readers many pearls | | | |
so that they (the older women) may train younger |
| of wisdom to aid them in the journey of parenthood. | | | | women to love their husbands and children, to be |
| LH: Sandra Gillmore, author of Mommy Come Home, | | | | sensible, chaste, busy at home
Titus 2:3-5 (New |
| thanks for your time and for participating in this Book | | | | American Bible) |
| Spotlight feature. Could you please tell our readers a | | | | I think the Lord says in His word that he prefers |
| little bit about your background and your family? | | | | mothers to be busy at home. Other versions of the |
| As a single person, I worked in various office positions, | | | | Word say 'Keeper of the home' or 'good |
| and prayed for the Lord to send me a devoted | | | | homemakers.' |
| Christian husband. God powerfully answered my | | | | The decision for me to stay home came when my |
| prayers to the point that I wrote a song for Dave | | | | husband and I became engaged. He felt very strongly |
| entitled, "You are the Answer to My Prayers." Dave | | | | that my role in the home was essential for a strong |
| and I have been married for 20 years and we have | | | | family to take hold. He felt that God would bless us if |
| been blessed with ten children, ages 19 down to 1 year | | | | we honored him by this devotion to the mother's role. |
| in age. We both shared the vision for a large family | | | | We both loved the prospect of having a large family |
| and grew into the homeschool lifestyle. Over the years | | | | and I couldn't see the point of bearing a child and giving |
| we've opened our home to exchange students, | | | | birth only to leave the child entrusted to someone |
| foreign refugees, college renters and the mentally ill. | | | | else's care. It didn't make sense. The entire pregnancy |
| Currently our quiver is full of our own family members! | | | | is a bonding experience for an important purpose. It is |
| Our children are very active in sports, music and | | | | a beautiful beginning to a lifelong relationship with your |
| scouts. I get involved with fundraisers and love to | | | | child. |
| cheer them on in their activities. I enjoy singing for | | | | Although we do not currently homeschool all of our |
| church which occasionally includes weddings and | | | | children, I do believe home schooling gives us the most |
| funerals. | | | | generous opportunity to fully instill our values into our |
| LH: Sandra, what is the main message of Mommy | | | | children's hearts and minds. Homeschooling was still a |
| Come Home and what prompted you to write the | | | | relatively new idea when we started about 11 years |
| book? | | | | ago. Dave had close friends he admired who |
| Mommy, Come Home is my love letter to all moms! | | | | homeschooled their children. I thought it all sounded |
| I've heard you stress-out on the soccer fields. I've seen | | | | very strange at first. Another family took our advice to |
| you cry at church from the pressure. You told me I | | | | home school (even though we didn't do it yet!) and we |
| was lucky I could stay home. I've tried to console you | | | | were amazed at how intimately peaceful and joyful |
| through the rat race. I've prayed for you. But I never | | | | their home had become since starting.) Then we |
| wanted to hurt your feelings. I never had the courage | | | | attended a large home school convention and it was |
| to tell you what was on my heart through the Holy | | | | very evident that these hundreds of families were |
| Spirit's leading. The message of Mommy, Come Home | | | | bringing up their children to serve the Lord in a very |
| is that God is calling each mother to embrace her | | | | powerfully practical way. It is more than just an |
| vocation to motherhood. This is your call that no one | | | | educational movement. It is a way to bond with your |
| else can replace as God intended. (Not even grandma | | | | children; to have the time and flexibility to demonstrate |
| or daddy.) You have been given special gifts to share | | | | the faith on a daily basis. And for those naysayers |
| with your children in a most generous way. This world | | | | who think the home is not 'real world', I say, 'What is |
| is not family-centered. The world wants to pull you | | | | real within our families becomes real within our world." |
| away and make you too busy to effectively mother | | | | Currently we have three high schoolers in the public |
| your children. Picture yourself ordering your favorite | | | | school system who are thriving with prayer clubs and |
| dessert in a restaurant only to have the waiter bring | | | | evangelizing when opportunity arises. We home school |
| you one small bite! Wouldn't you want more? 'But it's | | | | our four middle children and two of them also attend a |
| the highest quality of this dessert on the market, 'the | | | | church preschool three mornings a week for 3 hours a |
| waiter tells you. Our children want and need more - not | | | | day. Our toddler is also home full-time. |
| more stuff - more of our time. There is a way out of | | | | LH: Congratulations of the publication of this, your first |
| this madness. You have a choice. | | | | book! What a tremendous accomplishment! Are you |
| LH: For families who have become reliant upon two | | | | currently working on any new writing or creative |
| incomes, can you offer some creative suggestions to | | | | projects? |
| help ease the financial transition when Mom decides to | | | | Thank you so much. It has been truly exciting to watch |
| stay home full time with the children. | | | | the Lord open doors on what otherwise would seem |
| By eliminating, in large part, the extraneous expenses | | | | impossible or just plain ridiculous. I have felt called to |
| of working outside the home (such as more gas, wear | | | | write a book about special needs families. We have |
| and tear on your vehicles, or even the need for an | | | | not been blessed with a special needs child, but I have |
| additional vehicle, business attire, fast food, childcare) | | | | a friend who is legally blind and the mother of nine |
| and adding an enormous tool called flexibility to your | | | | children. Her family includes two sets of twins, one |
| schedule, you will be set up for a new way of thinking | | | | autistic child, one nearly deaf child, and four |
| and spending. The focus is on saving instead of | | | | vision-impaired children. The book will be about her and |
| earning. Simplicity is the key. Try asking yourself, 'Is this | | | | some other families that share their experiences and |
| a need or a want?' whether it's a new home, car or a | | | | faith-growth through their special needs situations. |
| toothbrush. (i.e.: do you really need the $5 variety or will | | | | LH: What resources can you recommend for new |
| the 88 cent version do the job?) Try drinking filtered | | | | moms? |
| water (from your own filter if possible.) Milk, juice and | | | | I highly recommend 'Family Foundations,' a publication of |
| soda are quite costly and don't offer much in the way | | | | the Couple to Couple League. ( So many moms are |
| of nutrition. Good quality vitamins can prevent a lot of | | | | told that the number one priority after giving birth |
| expensive and time-consuming trips to the doctor. | | | | should be birth-control. I do believe in child-spacing but |
| Consider shopping at various discount stores and | | | | so often mothers are discouraged from having more |
| make home-made cooking a top priority. Nothing has | | | | than two children these days, the 'accepted norm.' If |
| to be fancy. Instead of buying ingredients for a recipe, | | | | we truly open our hearts to another child, we have |
| just buy whatever is on sale and then cook | | | | more reason to want to stay home because more |
| accordingly when you get home. If we need fresh | | | | souls are depending on us. We also are being more |
| produce, for example, I come home with whatever | | | | open to our husband, accepting both the potential for |
| fruit is on sale for that week. This is a great way to | | | | life and the pleasure of the marriage act. This method |
| keep more variety in your kitchen too. | | | | of 'natural family planning' automatically builds mutual |
| For vacations, state and national parks are a treasure | | | | respect and self-giving in the marriage, which is so |
| to behold. If you bring your own food you've already | | | | much-needed today. |
| saved a bundle of money. Just pack the cooler(s) and | | | | Catholic Familyland ( an awesome family vacation |
| you can make great day trips or camp, or even rent a | | | | retreat experience, an apostolate devoted to teaching |
| housekeeping cabin. It's incredibly less expensive than | | | | the true faith by way of books, tapes and videos from |
| motels and amusement parks. And what could be | | | | top authorities such as Cardinal Arinze, Pope John Paul |
| more exciting than exploring 'God's playground?' For | | | | II, Scott Hahn, Mother Teresa, etc. In addition, they have |
| other entertainment, don't forget the library. Many | | | | their own TV network which is on a satellite with |
| libraries offer free concerts and other entertainment. | | | | many other Christian stations and costs only $11.99 per |
| Also, local museums and zoos almost always offer a | | | | month. We love this place. I can't say enough good |
| family membership. This is usually a wonderful bargain | | | | about it. |
| for a family. Make use of this and you won't fall prey | | | | Focus on the Family ( is a wonderful resource for all |
| to the lure of the expensive entertainment industry, | | | | sorts of parenting tips. And don't forget the Bible. It's full |
| which is usually full of negative messages that conflict | | | | of proverbs and other parental advice for the finding. |
| with our Christian faith anyway. | | | | LH: Thank you again Sandra for your time and for |
| Don't be afraid to accept hand-me-downs, shop at | | | | sharing your book. Are there any closing thoughts |
| thrift shops or garage sales for clothes or other items. | | | | you'd like to offer? |
| There are some great discount stores around too if | | | | The revival doesn't begin only at church. It begins in the |
| you make it a point to scout them out. I personally don't | | | | home. Home is not an escape from the world. It's a |
| enjoy shopping because it is so time-consuming. | | | | foundation to build the values of our faith. Then we |
| However, I make a point to shop during low-traffic | | | | must share that faith with the world. One family at a |
| times and that makes a huge difference. It's the | | | | time. Thank you, Lisa for this opportunity to share from |
| flexibility factor that will prevent you from feeling | | | | my heart to other moms. I pray the book will be used |
| rushed all the time and missing out on bargains. | | | | as an instrument of hope and healing to every family's |
| LH: Many "Stay at home" moms feel isolated and | | | | mother that reads it. |
| lonely. What proactive steps can they take to help | | | | For more information or to order Mommy Come |
| themselves overcome these feelings? | | | | Home visit |
| Satan loves Christians to become isolated. Then he | | | | Copyright 2004 Lisa M. |
| can trap you into thinking 'no one understands me,' etc. | | | | |