Bluetooth Was a Norse King

My knowledge of Bluetooth has a gap tooth. Bluetoothkingdoms, and our Bluetooth brings together different
is the ear thingy people wear that allows fordevices to work under one technology."
hands-free, wireless use of their cell phones. Now youAnd some underling, no doubt, yelped, "Yeah! And isn't
can run, drive, snowboard, even ride a motorcycle andcommunication today's higher power?"
never miss a call. Cell chatter is paramount and thereCell phone technology and a Danish Christian king -
is little patience for those, like myself, who bring up thethat's quite a stretch. But then, what do computers
rear of an inching glacier.have in common with an Apple? Oh, right, it's a
Without a cell phone, I am a lumbering Techno-saur,Genesis thing. (I made that up.)
soon to stumble into a tar pit (if not outright pushed) forBut having what looks like a metal frog perched on my
not adapting to evolution. I point to my mouth and grunt,ear is ugly. Why is a Bluetooth so big when even
"Uh! Uh!" and so to expand my vocabulary, I tentativelydevices for the hard-of-hearing are now barely
explore Bluetooth technology.noticeable?
The beauty of Bluetooth is that it lets various devicesI know why. Something has to separate hands-free
by different manufacturers (or providers) "talk" to eachcell phone users from Tourette Syndrome sufferers. A
other. Being "Bluetooth enabled" allows wireless use ofvisual cue is needed because it's harder to tell them
cell phones, cameras, printers and other devices.)apart. Thus, the sizable ear shield tells me that the lone
On the phone front, simply put your cell phone in yourperson at the next table is actually sputtering and
pocket, pop on your Bluetooth ear thingy, and if yourswearing at someone else.
phone is "on," voices will talk into your ear automatically.But I always return to my natural instinct to resist
Look, Ma, no hands!owning a cell phone, never mind a Bluetooth.
I've heard of long-toothed, houndstooth, evenI don't want to be "more productive," as in the ability to
saber-toothed, but why is it called Bluetooth?talk, eat and send something to the printer while
The name derives from King Harald Blatand ofstanding at a burger counter.
Denmark (910-986). Blatand or "Bluetooth," comes fromI relish my "dream-time" while driving. (With the attention
the Norse word, bla (blue), which also can mean darkspan of a kitten, so do I really need another
or black. Methinks Vikings lacked good dental care.distraction?)
But the Danish king's claim to fame was that he unitedSpending time and being present fully are precious
Denmark and Norway through Christianity in the 10thgifts. I don't want to join the legions of diners who sit
century. In fact an ancient Rune stone, located on aacross from each other, but talk to invisible parties.
UNESCO world heritage site in Jelling, Denmark,Speaking of timing, I hate it when the momentum of
translates to, "King Haraldr ordered this monumentsomebody's story (or worse, mine!) is interrupted by
made in memory of Gormr, his father, and in memorythe almighty, "Oh, hold on a minute, I gotta get this."
of Thyrvé, his mother; that Haraldr who wonYes, I know I could turn my cell phone off, but knowing
for himself all of Denmark and Norway and made themyself, I never would. (Be happy - one less offender
Danes Christian."on the loose.)
Imagine the corporate meeting the day the technologyTo many, I'm stuck in the dark ages where Bluetooth
was officially named "Bluetooth."remains a peaceable Norse king. Ah, the blessed
Perhaps a marketer said, "The connection is crystalsilence!
clear. Harald Bluetooth brought together warring