Hearing and Deaf People Are Terrified

Hearing-assisted people usually hear half a sentenceStage 2: Blunt phrases:
and guess the rest. You make an intelligent remark yet"That was way too fast." (usually to hotel receptionists
they stopped talking about that five minutes ago.or Call Centres. Their welcome blurb sounds like
You're embarrassed and go quiet. If you are socializing,gibberish. Ask them to repeat and smile kindly; it's their
hearing people are talking about something else. Youfault not yours. It works because they're amazed.
look desperately for some hint of what they're talkingStage 3: Incongruent response to any question you
about, then give up and switch off..don't hear
Sound familiar?"It's half-past four." you say.
They have started another conversation throughThey will look blank until you tell them to please look at
rudeness, ignorance or plain fear because they haveyou instead of their desk, their feet etc. Take the
no idea how much you have heard. They do not wantmoment and tell them what you want.
to make themselves look silly by repeating it all if youStage 4: Impossible request:
don't need it. Besides, it holds up their conversation.In a coffee bar, ask for something they don't have like
Why are hearing people scared of us when we'veshoe polish. That tends to get the attention of all the
always thought it was the other way around? It is howstaff. I did have to confess:
we have taught them to think. I will say that again."I didn't hear a word so I made it up."
They have been taught to think that way. I know I'mI've been too embarrassed to go back since so that is
guilty. If I am in a total panic because I cannot figure outrisky!
what someone is saying I blurt out:Repetition works and you can do it in any daily
"I've got a hearing-aid." Or "I can't hear you."situation. It may take a while before your work
You can see the increasing levels of desperation. Thatcolleagues recognize the pattern of the stages yet
makes a hearing person panic and they will run away.they are probably the main offenders. They lean
If you have ever noticed someone giving you a wideforward when they want to hear. It's about teaching
berth at a drinks party because a little bird has toldhearing people to appreciate the difficulties and how to
them you need everything repeated, you will knowhelp you. Customer Services of major Department
what I'm talking about.Stores are usually very quick. We appreciate their
What you can do:problem in understanding; heck it's taken us long
Turn the situation on its head. Pretend that they areenough to accept it.. Say it with a smile and they will
the ones who cannot hear and therefore you have toremember you.
explain to them what they need to do. You can doOn the plus side, family will know when you cannot
one of these stages or in desperate situations, youhear. My daughter says she can always tell because I
can use all four.fidget! That's because I'm trying to work out when I
Stage 1: Gentle phrases:can tell them I haven't heard a word of what they've
"Please look at me I'm lip-reading." (it certainly slowsbeen saying for the past ten minutes.
down the fast talkers!)