How to Make Requests

There's no doubt that there is a correlation betweenit was sent to me until I read the last sentence: "If you
those who make requests and those who havehave any questions about this, ask Michael Lipp; he's in
power. And an equal correlation (surprisingly) betweencharge of this project."
those who are asked and those who have power.So, given this, how could you be trained to make
But - not surprisingly - most people have a difficult timerequests?
making requests.I have a few suggestions to ease you into developing
It seems simple enough. Get or create permission torequesting as a habit.
ask a question or a favor and then go ahead and ask.First- Pick a request that is very easy to accept, for
The answer is either yes, no. It can also be a counterinstance, "Can you lend me a dollar? I'll give it back
offer (yes, except or no, but) or 'come back later'. Andafter lunch. Or something like that. Make the request to
that's the game.someone who you know will say yes.
Well, there are all sorts of mind games that go into it:Make a similar request every day. You can up the
getting permission, separating a refusal from personallevel of difficulty or the frequency (move to 2 a day...).
rejection, dealing with yes (most of us don't realize thatThen introduce a request that someone can say no to.
when someone says yes, then the requestor has aNotice your response.
commitment to follow up,Second - This is the same, except backwards. Pick a
And there are many different forms of request - fromrequest that is totally unreasonable, one that no one is
insistent requests (called, in marriages, 'nagging') tolikely to accept. Make it of someone who you don't
very, very plaintive requests (pleading or begging.) Incare whether or not he/she accepts, though you'll be
fact, there is a full scale of request types.delighted if it is unexpectedly accepted. "Will you take
I once had a boss who was incapable of requestingnotes for me at this meeting? I can't go."
(because requests allow "no." But she was alsoMake a similarly unreasonable request every day.
inapable of making assignments. I realized this was aThen make a difficult request, though not absurd.
dilemma for her when I received an email thatAfter a while you will be ready for real ones.
completely described a project, but I had no idea why