Why Smart People Sometimes Have Poor Social Skills

Do you ever have trouble making conversation withsmall talk that doesn't seem to lead anywhere.
others even though you consider yourself to be an4.) In some cases, people who are smarter than
intelligent person?average actually feel superior to others and believe
If so, this may puzzle you. You may wonder why youthey should not have to waste their time with average
are so poor at making conversation with others, evenpeople having average conversations. They may really
though you are very smart, and know a lot oftruly be snobs at heart.
interesting things.5.) Many very intelligent people suffer from extreme
The truth is that many average people with averageshyness or from poor self esteem. This may cause
intelligence and average interests are much better atthem to feel that they have nothing interesting or
making small talk and have better social skills thanworthwhile to contribute to a conversation.
people who are very intelligent.6.) Some very intelligent people, particularly those who
And many people who are very intelligent areare strong in scientific and mathematical skills may
extremely poor at making small talk conversation andhave a condition called Asperger's syndrome. This
may have poor social skills.condition which is believed to be related to autism,
Why should this be?shows itself in many different ways. Often, the person
Here are some of the reasons why very intelligent,who has some degree of Asperger's is extremely
very creative people often have difficulty in makinggood at focusing on a scientific topic, but is unable to
small talk conversation successfully:understand the kinds of social interactions that most
1.) They may be perfectionists. These people mayother people take for granted. People with Asperger's
have very high expectations of themselves aboutmay talk in a rigid, mechanical way, and be
everything they do. When they think they have faileduninterested in other people's emotional lives.
at anything, they judge themselves very harshly. If theyNo matter how intelligent a person is, a lack of social
think they are failing at small talk, they just get evenskills can hold them back in their social life and their
more nervous and tongue tied. Their harsh selfcareer.
judgment makes them so anxious that they cannotSo if you are one of those people who is quite smart,
relax and simply enjoy being with other people.but has problems with social skills and with making
2.) People who are very smart may have spent mostsmall talk, what should you do?
of their life trying to become very intellectuallyFirst, you must ask yourself whether improving your
developed, but sometimes they neglect to developsocial skills is something that you really want to do.
their social and emotional side. They may feel thatIf the answer is truly no, then you don't need to work
developing their social and emotional side is not veryon trying to improve this particular talent.
important, or they may feel that it is too late to tryHowever, if the answer is yes, the good news is that
learn these new difficult skills.you really can improve your conversational skills and
3.) They may be very serious people and believe thatyour ability to enjoy small talk, and have enjoyable
they should only spend their time thinking about serioussocial relationships with others.
matters and talking about serious matters. They mayHowever, you will need to make a real commitment to
believe that talking about unimportant things is a wasteimproving your skills in this area, and you will have to
of time. This makes them get bored very quickly withpractice talking with others and making friends.